February 2009
January 2009
Pet Peeve #23
People Who Don’t Clean the Snow Off Their Cars.
And I don’t mean the people who don’t brush off the light layer. I mean the jackass driving the Ford Expedition, who leaves the six-inch layer of snow on top of his car so the damn thing looks like it’s been frosted.
Awesome. That’s either going to fly off and hit my car or slide down into his windshield when he hits...
Harrruummph
I had this whole post planned out with a really cute old photo that I scanned at work and e-mailed to myself. Then, somehow, I managed to delete all the new mails in my e-mail box. Grrrrr…..
Thanks Alena. SO true.
heylaney:
skysignal:
LIBRA - The Harmonizer (Sept 23 - Oct 22) Nice to everyone they meet. Can’t make up their mind. Have own unique appeal. Creative, energetic, and very social. Hates to be alone. Peaceful, generous. Very loving and beautiful. Flirtatious. Give in too easily. Procrastinators. Very gullible.
Super Bowl XLIII
Tami: Who’s playing in the Super Bowl this weekend?
Me: Pittsburgh and Arizona. Also known as We Don’t Care versus We Don’t Care.
Tami: Ahhh…..WDC VS. WDC. Nice.
Oedipalariffic
I’ve just made up this word, but I think it is very, very necessary.
Oedipalariffic (Adj.): When a man seriously dates and/or marries a woman who looks EXACTLY like his mother. To the point where people think the wife is actually the mom’s daughter (shudder).
Synonyms include: gross, disgusting and abnormal.
Examples: “Dude, did you see his girlfriend? She looks like his mom....
Pet Peeve #14
The deliberate misspelling of words.
I was walking through the mall and passed a Limited Too. They had a sign that said “All the Stuff You Luv.” I do realize this store is aimed at the ‘tweens, but is it that hard to spell the word right? And it doesn’t end there.
We have stores with misspelled names like Toys ‘R’ Us, and Dunkin Donuts. This is just...
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Not a Role Model.
So I spent most of my day teaching bad words (that you can get away with saying) to 10-year-olds, trying to get a 17-year-old to admit to his mother that he kisses girls, and offering vanilla frosting as an acceptable choice for dinner.
And people wonder why I don’t have children.
Fire Drill.
Of course. On the coldest night of the friggin’ year, the fire alarm in my building goes off. And not the little smoke detector in my place, but the god awful piercing one in the whole building.
So I get on my coat and shoes. Then I look at the cat and I thought “I’m sure this isn’t a real fire, but what if it is?” So I get out the cat carrier and walk over to the...
It ends now.
I know. If we ignore Ann Coulter, she’ll go away. No one should waste time, breath, energy or typing skill on her. I just think she’s an evil person with no soul. Her arguments are crap and if anyone disagrees with her, she out-screeches them or complains that she’s too controversial and they can’t handle it. She’s a fraud. No more wasting type on this horse-faced horror show. It ends now.
Pet Peeve #57
WTF?!#$?@!?>
Why on Earth does every state have a different method for determining where the transponder lanes should go? In Massachusetts the cash lanes are in the middle and the transponder lanes are on the outside. In New York the transponder lanes are in the middle and the cash in the outside. Seriously? All you toll plaza czars need to get together and find a strategy. Don’t make...
More Fluffer Talk
I know. I’m obsessed with the porn industry talk this week. So first of all — hysterical that Larry Flynt and the creepy Girls Gone Wild guy are looking for a bail-out from Congress. It just leads to so many fun puns: Yeah, that be some stimulus package. Oh boy, they’ve fallen on hard times. And so on. I could do that for hours, but I will spare you.
Last night on MSNBC on...
Still A Jackass.
My sister read my last post and said “How, exactly, were $200 mittens going to help in this new career of yours?”
I’m going to be honest: This wasn’t a well-thought out plan.
I Am a Jackass.
So I was out with some friends and the word “fluffer” came up. I knew it was a job in the adult-movie industry, but just made up my own definition. In my mind, it was someone who fluffed the pillows, fixed the sheets, maybe rearranged limbs for a better shot.
So as the conversation turns to overly expensive luxury items, we began talking about $200 mittens. (Thank you Bernie Maddoff...
Labor Unions
I work for a labor union. I don’t talk about it a lot because the conversation usually goes one of two ways: either the person is a die-hard union supporter and wants to talk labor all night (which isn’t too bad) or (more frequently) they are anti-union and want to tell me how bad unions are.
Last night was a perfect example. I was out with friends I hadn’t seen in years and one...
